High school writing instruction should be less creative and more ‘formulaic’

“Academic writing is formulaic“, according to one SAT tutor who has written a number of books on the topic.  It would seem to follow that creative writing should not be an important focus of high school curriculum.  Students should master the “formula” before they spend too much time on poetry, journaling, or similar exercises in creative writing.

… one of the things I try to get kids away from in terms of their academic writing is the idea that everything they write has to be wildly new and creative. Academic writing is formulaic. It just is. Clarity trumps pretty much everything. You can be creative when you’ve mastered all the rules, but until they, you need to pay attention to what people with more experience do and learn from them. (I think part of the problem is all the hysteria over plagiarism: of COURSE kids shouldn’t be stealing other people’s work, but they also need models! How else are they supposed to learn to write?) When they try to be creative, they write jumbled sentences and the like — it’s just a disaster.

When it comes to writing, most students need to learn the rules before they can break the rules.

Students are not being taught academic writing in high school.

In his “third column on the teaching of writing in colleges and universities“, Stanley Fish addressed a question from readers.

Isn’t the mastery of forms something that should be taught in high school or earlier?

His response, based on years of experience as a college professor:

By all the evidence, high schools and middle schools are not teaching writing skills in an effective way, if they are teaching them at all….

High schools should try something different.

I think K-12 schools would see greater success if they used something like the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’, a methodical and efficient approach to writing instruction.  I would love to see a separate composition course in high school, employing a basic method like that of Kerrigan, and involving plenty of practice writing.  I suspect a course like this would work well as an online option.

It worked at New Dorp High School in New York City, where it was found”that returning to fundamentals like explicit grammar instruction and formulaic writing has succeeded in turning around the dismal performance of high poverty students”.

The best nouns ‘are concrete rather than abstract’

Writing advice from Constance Hale in the New York Times

… When we write, though, we want to say as much as we can in as few words as possible, so we find specific nouns (mother, cardiologist, kayaker). Mother is better than female, because it reveals gender as well as personal information. But nouns like soccer mom, mother hen or matron say even more because they also give clues about age and attitude.

The best nouns, then, are concrete rather than abstract, specific rather than general. They are also evocative. To illustrate this, let’s return to boats. Some of the synonyms for boat, like vessel, are so vague they could apply to any means of transportation — or any container, for that matter. Commonplace nouns like boat, ship or sea craft are less abstract. But let’s get precise: how about scow,skiff, yacht and yawl? Brand names like Sunfish, Hobie Cat, Boston Whaler give even more concrete images, while other proper nouns, like the Titanic, the U.S.S. Kentucky and the Hokule‘a allow us to precisely picture an exact boat. Nouns help us paint a scene, understand a character or put a finger on a theme. It’s worth taking the time to get them right.

Hale’s advice is echoed in Step 4 in the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point.

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

Here is one example from Kerrigan’s book:

1. GENERAL:  In her room I noticed two books.
2. SPECIFIC:  On the small table near Jessica’s plaid easy chair I noticed Heller’s Catch-22 and Galsworthy’s Man of Property. 

This reminds me that I must get back to my Writing to the Point project, which got derailed due to other priorities.

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – FIRST DRAFT being CONCRETE

I’m still on Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point, and the latest assignment to write the first draft of an essay continues the focus on being specific and concrete.  (This is part of my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

…
ABSTRACT or GENERAL vs. CONCRETE or SPECIFIC:
To reiterate a point from the previous post, Kerrigan Method sentences X-1-2-3 are usually abstract or general.  In contrast, the sentences in the body of the paragraphs that follow from 1-2-3 must fill in the details by being concrete and specific.  Both types of sentences are vital to good writing.

…

THE ASSIGNMENT
Write a theme on the following sentence X:  ”A student must have a regular schedule of study.” … be specific and concrete, far beyond what you feel necessary.  Go all out in this respect.  Go into detail .  Give examples.  Don’t feel ridiculous.  You are not expected to produce a “good” theme here, but you can make it a good exercise.

After considerable head scratching, here is what I wrote.

…
X  A student must have a regular schedule of study..
1.  A student needs a study schedule to maximize academic achievement.
2.  A student needs a study schedule to accommodate his other activities.
3.  A student needs a study schedule to maintain good health.

—————————————————————————————————————————————

X  A student must have a regular schedule of study.

1.  A student needs a study schedule to maximize academic achievement.  Since his first priority is usually his schooling, it is important that a student find ways to improve his academic performance.  One way to do that is to plan and implement a study schedule that will put his school work at the top of his list of things to do.  If getting an A in a chemistry test requires three hours of reviewing notes and practicing problems, then that time must be set aside to take precedence over television, Facebook or daydreaming.  For example, sometimes scheduling 20 minutes a day to review vocabulary words is the only way to get a top grade in Spanish class.

2.  A student needs a study schedule to accommodate his other activities.  While academics are his first priority, a student must also fit in all types of other activities into his routine.  Eating, sleeping, sports, club activities, and simply relaxing are usually all important aspects of a student’s life.  Without a schedule, time is frittered away and a student may end up sleep deprived or being kicked off the track team for missing practices.  All these different activities can be planned so a student will be able to perform competently in school and as well as in other parts of his life.

3.  A student needs a study schedule to maintain good health.  Without a schedule, the elements of a healthy lifestyle will suffer.  If a student neglects to plan ahead for sufficient study time, then he may find himself up late at night cramming for a test when he should be sleeping.  He may find himself eating on the run, which often means fast food and cookies instead of healthier options.  This can lead to poor nutrition, weight gain, or more serious medical conditions.  Making time for adequate studying causes a student to feel well-prepared, while the opposite causes stress.  Sleep deprivation, poor eating habits and high stress can be avoided by a well-planned study schedule.

…

WHAT I LEARNED
There is always room for more detail.  Even when you think you’ve put in as much as can, you can usually squeeze in some more.  Editing out excessive information can be done later in the process, as I will probably learn in future assignments..
.… 

Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 1 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – SUBJECT & PREDICATE
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – using EXAMPLES
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – ABSTRACT vs. CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – FUNCTION OF A PARAGRAPH

Step 1 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – SUBJECT & PREDICATE

I’m backtracking to cover some basic elements of  Kerrigan’s Writing to the Point Step 1, omitted in my previous posts. (For new readers, this is my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)

Here is Kerrigan’s first step in writing an expository essay:

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

.

The Step 1 sentence is what Kerrigan calls the X-sentence, and it should have a SUBJECT and a PREDICATE.

First, a review of some basic grammar:

The subject is the person or thing that acts or is described in the sentence. The predicate, on the other hand, is that action or description.

At a basic level, the X-sentence will look like this:

Subject———1———1———1—–Predicate
Somebody or something …………… is something
Somebody or something …………… was something
Somebody or something …………… does something
Somebody or something …………… did something

Examples:
Subject———1———1———1—–Predicate
Oxygen ………………………………………. is essential for life.
George Carlin …………………………….. was funny.
Power …………………………………………. corrupts.
Grandma …………………………………….. taught us valuable lessons.

Subject and predicate – both must be parts of the X-sentence.

The X-sentence is the thesis of the essay.

A subject without a predicate is a topic, but not a thesis. For expository writing you need a thesis, not just a topic.  This is an essential point in the Writing to the Point method.  The supporting details for the thesis flow from the X-sentence, creating the structure that makes the essay concise, clear and to the point.

Here are a few more examples of X-sentences:

X  Autumn is an exhilarating time of year.
X  Hosting a teen party can be nerve-wracking.
X  The Penn State scandal is a tragic event. 

Other characteristics of the X-sentence:

• Short and simple
• Declarative sentence – a statement, not a question or a command
• Should make only one statement

All this is basic stuff, right?  Sometimes kids don’t learn (or remember) basic stuff.  I’m sometimes surprised at what kids are not taught in school.

Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – using EXAMPLES
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – ABSTRACT vs. CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – FUNCTION OF A PARAGRAPH

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – FUNCTION OF A PARAGRAPH

Although I’ve lost some momentum in getting through my writing project, today I’m going back on track to write about the next segment.  The topic is the all-important “function of the paragraph” as explained in Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point.  (For new readers, this is my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

…
F. THE FUNCTION OF A PARAGRAPH:
First, let’s look at the Kerrigan X-1-2-3 sentence structure, and relate it to the more traditional names used by instructors.

Traditional names for X-1-2-3:
–  X is commonly called a thesis sentence, thesis, thesis statement, main idea, or theme sentence
–  1-2-3 are topic sentences

Function of a paragraph:

… a paragraph is a group of sentences whose only function is to provide specific, concrete details for the thought expressed in its topic sentence.

This is very important!  Don’t include extra stuff in your paragraph, even if it sounds good!  I suspect many developing writers break this rule often, resulting in less coherent, wordy, rambling essays that distract and tire the reader while failing to clearly make their point.  [This blogger is guilty as charged!]

I like this passage, having seen young writers struggle this way.

If writing seemed to you, before you began to study this book, a process of putting down one thought, then thinking of another thought and putting it down, then racking your brains to think of still another; then a paragraph, for you, meant an indentation marking some greater break in thought than occurs between sentences. *

By the way, the punctuation (especially the semicolon) in the sentence quoted above intrigues me, but I’ll not explore further for now and just assume it is correct.  This is Kerrigan writing, after all.

Editing is vital
If the paragraph’s function is solely to elaborate and explain more about the topic sentence, than  it is almost inevitable that some editing must occur.  Here’s Kerrigan on the pain of deleting material.

If you plant a vegetable garden, you may have to pull out a flower simply because it does not belong.

Even if it’s a gorgeous bloom that has touched your heart, yank it out if it doesn’t belong.

…
WHAT I LEARNED
Stick to the topic in your first sentence!

* CORRECTIONS IN RED

…
Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – using EXAMPLES
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – ABSTRACT vs. CONCRETE

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – ABSTRACT vs. CONCRETE

The distinction between abstract/general and concrete/specific is highlighted in this assignment that is part of Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point.  (This is part of my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

…
E. ABSTRACT or GENERAL vs. CONCRETE or SPECIFIC:
By their very nature, sentences X-1-2-3  (Kerrigan Method Steps 1 & 2) are usually abstract or general.  The sentences that follow from 1-2-3 must fill in the details by being concrete and specific.  Both types of sentences are vital in good writing.

… True sophistication in writing requires not just the concrete and specific, nor just the abstract and general, but a skillful combination of the two.  Look at any professional writing you admire, and you’ll see what I mean.

…

THE ASSIGNMENT
[W]rite two pairs of sentences.  The first sentence of each pair is to be in general, even abstract, terms; the second is to state the same idea in specific, concrete terms.

Example from the book:

1. GENERAL:  In her room I noticed two books.
2. SPECIFIC:  On the small table near Jessica’s plaid easy chair I noticed Heller’s Catch-22 and Galsworthy’s Man of Property. 

What I wrote:

1. GENERAL:  Today is gloomy
2. SPECIFIC:  Today I was forced to turn on my desk light because gray clouds are blocking any trace of sunlight while the constant drip of chilly raindrops is creating dampness in the air.

1. GENERAL:  My office is messy.
2. SPECIFIC:  Piles of books and papers cover most surfaces in my office, a shabby Easter basket filled with old scraps of paper is shoved in one corner, and various wires lay haphazardly around my desk.

…

WHAT I LEARNED
Expressing the same idea in two distinct sentences, one using general terms and the other using details, made it easy to see the differences and the benefits of adding concrete details.  This would be a good exercise to do occasionally as a check if I’m including enough details in my writing or to remind me of the contrasts between both types of sentences. ..

Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – using EXAMPLES

‘Writing, writing, writing’ – a skill lacking among too many college graduates

Jeff Selingo wrote in the Chronicle of Higher Ed about what he learned from employers who are having a difficult time finding qualified employees to hire among recent college graduates.  This was just one problem he found.

Writing, writing, writing. We keep throwing around the word “skills,” but it seems the one skill that almost every job requires is the ability to write well, and too many graduates are lacking in that area. That’s where many of the recruiters were quick to let colleges off the hook, for the most part. Students are supposed to learn to write in elementary and secondary school. They’re not forgetting how to write in college. It’s clear they’re not learning basic grammar, usage, and style in K-12.

Why are students not learning to write before they get to college?  Maybe a different type of writing instruction is needed?

Related:  The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’

(Cross-posted at Kitchen Table Math)

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – using EXAMPLES

The use of examples is covered in the next assignment in Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point.  (This is part of my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

…
D. USING EXAMPLES:
Another definition of detail is “short example”.  An example is something taken from among a number of things like it, and used to stand for them.

• Examples tend to be concrete and specific.
• Examples are not analogies, which are fine but get us away from facts.
• Use these kind of words:  ”like, such as, for example, for instance”
• Use lots of examples to bring a matter vividly before the mind’s eye of a reader.

…
THE ASSIGNMENT
Write a theme in which you use examples liberally.  Mare sure each paragraph has at least one sentence that beings with “For example” and then is followed by a sentence that is a long example.

For this assignment I re-used my “Autumn” essay, but added “for example”  in several places according to assignment instructions.

Here is my essay, using the Kerrigan format of starting with the X-1-2-3 sentences.

…
X  Autumn is an exhilarating time of year.
1. It is a time of colorful foliage.
2. It is a time of crisp weather.
3. It is a time of fun-filled activities.

—————————————————————————————————————————————

X  Autumn is an exhilarating time of year.

1.  It is a time of colorful foliage. For example, during this time of year maple trees turn bright red and oak trees become golden. Ferns become a rusty copper color. As they fall to the ground, beautifully colored leaves cover paths and roads like a rainbow. Mountainsides and roadways become brilliant works of art.

2.  It is a time of crisp weather. It usually starts in late September when people will comment that there’s a touch of fall in the air. They bring out their sweaters to protect against the slight chill of early fall. As the season moves on, the first hints of frost appear on some early mornings. Even on days with full sun, the atmosphere feels different from typical summer days. For example, going to the beach on a sunny fall day is a sharp contrast to spending a long July day there when the sun is high in the sky.

3.  It is a time of fun-filled activities. Many families spend weekends picking apples and pumpkins. The next few days may find them baking pies and carving jack-o-lanterns. Preparations for Halloween are as much fun as the actual trick-or-treating. For example, people enjoy designing and creating costumes while anticipation builds for the big Halloween night when children roam the neighborhoods trying to fill their bags with candy.

WHAT I LEARNED
Besides the basic lesson on the importance of examples, this assignment also reminded me that the Kerrigan method teaches writing by systematically moving through a hierarchy of skills.  In this case, instructions to use specific words (“like, such as, for example, for instance”) serve to nudge the developing writer into adding examples.  Later on, as the student’s writing becomes more sophisticated, it becomes unnecessary to use these specific words every time.

Since my original essay already included many examples, following instructions and adding at least one “for example” phrase to each paragraph did not appreciably enhance the final product.  In fact, I think this step made the essay a little clunky.   But it was a valuable exercise to show a technique for explicitly teaching a developing writer to use examples.  (In hindsight, I realized I should have started from scratch and not re-used my old essay, but I was trying to save myself a little time.)

…
Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – going into DETAIL

The next assignment in Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point asks the writer to focus on including details.  (This is part of my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method, explained in my initial post in this series.)  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.  (Chapter 4, page 43)

C.  GOING INTO DETAIL:
Step 4 calls on the writer to supply the facts that go along with the 1-2-3 sentences. Give evidence, NOT just repetition.  Omitting details and simply repeating different versions of the topic sentence is what some students do; this is poor writing.

THE ASSIGNMENT
Write five to ten sentences on this sentence “I’d hate to have you see my _______ drawer.”  Give details.  Here’s what I wrote:

I’d hate to have you see my kitchen junk drawer.  It is full of items that should be thrown out, if I ever got around to taking on that task.  It contains a few black metal buttons for a coat long discarded. There is a blue scrubbing sponge.  Several water bottle tops in assorted bright colors are in the drawer.  Three brass cabinet knobs with off-white centers are in a plastic zip-lock bag.  The steel and copper inner parts of an old kitchen faucet are in another bag. An old Bic Wite-Out bottle containing dried up sludge is in the drawer.  Finally, the strangest item of all is a bag with a couple of filthy, burned out cigarette butts saved in case we needed evidence for a trash fire we had a few years ago.

WHAT I LEARNED
By focusing on details and being required to write a minimum number of sentences, I avoided the mistake of  simply writing in generalities about all the “stuff” or “junk” or “things” in my drawer.  It was a good exercise in learning how to make an effort to pull out informative details that paint a picture for the reader and make for more effective writing.

…
Previous posts in this series:

• The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC
• Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE

Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being CONCRETE

I have completed the Being CONCRETE section in Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of Writing to the Point.  This is part of my project to study and learn the entire Six-Step method.  For a recap, here are Steps 1 through 4.

STEP 1. Write a short, simple declarative sentence that makes one statement. (Chapter 1, page 6)

STEP 2. Write three sentences about the sentence in Step 1—clearly and directly about the whole of that sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 2, page 18.)

STEP 3. Write four or five sentences about each of the three sentences in Step 2—clearly and directly about the whole of the Step 2 sentence, not just something in it. (Chapter 3, page 31.)

STEP 4. Make the material in the four or five sentences of Step 3 as specific and concrete as possible. Go into detail. Use examples. Don’t ask, “What will I say next?” Instead, say some more about what you have just said. Your goal is to say a lot about a little, not a little about a lot.

The second part in Step 4 focuses on being “CONCRETE”

B.  BEING CONCRETE:
Use words that are not abstract; that can be seen, touched, smelled, tasted, felt, weighed, measured, lifted, dropped, moved, etc.

Examples:  child, chair, pencil are concrete; freedom, justice, bravery are not

THE ASSIGNMENT
Given an abstract word, write the name of a concrete person or thing you can associate with it.  Here are a few examples, with the abstract word highlighted.

• compassion / Mother Teresa
• democracy / voting machine
• peace / sleeping baby

Next, given a concrete thing, write an abstract word you can associate with it.  Here are a few examples, with the concrete word highlighted.

• a whip / pain
• schoolbooks / learning
• vitamin capsules / health (or hypochondria!)

THE BENEFITS OF BEING CONCRETE
Using concrete terms helps to make writing more clear and more interesting.  Think of a politician who uses abstract terms such as, “We’ll direct all our considerable resources to satisfying the needs of our constituents” instead of, “I’ll spend $10 million of your taxes on a new highway that will help my biggest campaign contributor.”  The latter, using concrete words, is definitely clearer, adding transparency and more “interest” to the message.  Don’t you wish more politicians used the Kerrigan method?

Previous posts in this series:
The Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
Step 3 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’
Step 4 of the Kerrigan method of ‘Writing to the Point’ – being SPECIFIC